Thursday, November 17, 2011

May I Have a Redo?

How many times have we each said, "If I could go back knowing what I know now." ? Of course, that is not possible. In general, I have few regrets and I am tempted to be prideful and say, "If I changed any decisions I wouldn't be who I am now." While that is true, and according to Romans 8:28 all of these things work together for my good. There are definitely things I wish I had a redo on.

One thing I would have done differently is that I would have honored my father and mother better than I did. Though, I have tried to be very honoring in my adult years, I see the years that I allowed the moths to eat. I regret the times I was sneaky and deceitful and justified it in my mind that I wasn't hurting anyone but myself. I would redo that.

I would have been kinder and gentler with my children. Oh! How I would like to retract angry words and actions. I believe all my children are walking in forgiveness toward me, but it is to their credit, not mine. If I could redo this one so that they never had a memory of my unrighteous anger I would be so grateful for that opportunity. I would love it if my children never had a single memory of my angry countenance.

I would redo allowing my peer group to replace the group of amazing old people I had the privelege to know in my youth. Not that my peers were less valuable than the elders, both were precious to God, but I have this feeling that I blinked and lost the old folks. I regret the times I drove past and planned to stop on the next trip. There were questions they have taken to their graves that I wish I had asked...and written the answers  down. I would take a redo on this one too.

I wish I hadn't cared about being cool. I wasted a lot of time on cool. Wish I had a redo.

I would redo wasting my time in general. I allowed the three p's of pride, procrastination and perfectionism to keep me stalled so often. What might I have accomplished in my youth, with comparatively more strength and energy if I hadn't allowed my time to be wasted? I wish I would have risked doing more things poorly instead of waiting until I was certain to be able to succeed before I attempted things.

I would redo the way I took care of my body.

I would have saved my heart for Mr. Right (known to my friends as Clint). I could have spent my time more wisely than in learning how to survive a bad first marriage. All the lessons I learned in that marriage, I could have learned proactively from reading and heeding God's word. Definite redo there.

I would have said "Thank You!" much more often.

I would have kept my 67 explanation needed. I would also have bought that navy blue Mustang with the butterscotch leather interior.

I would have walked more steadfastly for my Lord. I would have been more honorable. I would have sought first the kingdom of God and His Righteousness. Like Samuel, I would have said as a child, "Speak; for thy servant heareth." and I would have meant it.

Make today a great day for someone!


2 Moms of a Feather...Stick Together said...

Hey Lawana,
Thanks for sharing from your heart that...
you care about others
you are not perfect
you love the Lord Jesus most of all.
Love you,
Mommy 2
P.S. God might give you a chance to do a redo or two.

Niculous said...

If you could compile the writings on this weblog, and get it published in a could buy me a brand new truck after paying for your yacht.

Niculous said...

Oh and I love you other mom.

Lawana said...

Mommy 2 He has given me opportunity for many redos. I am so grateful for his grace.

Lawana said...

Niculous, You figure out how I can do it. I will buy you that truck. You know I have adopted children, birth children and Jalapeno children. My Jalapeno children have a special spot in my heart.

Love you too.