Thursday, November 17, 2011

May I Have a Redo?



How many times have we each said, "If I could go back knowing what I know now." ? Of course, that is not possible. In general, I have few regrets and I am tempted to be prideful and say, "If I changed any decisions I wouldn't be who I am now." While that is true, and according to Romans 8:28 all of these things work together for my good. There are definitely things I wish I had a redo on.

One thing I would have done differently is that I would have honored my father and mother better than I did. Though, I have tried to be very honoring in my adult years, I see the years that I allowed the moths to eat. I regret the times I was sneaky and deceitful and justified it in my mind that I wasn't hurting anyone but myself. I would redo that.

I would have been kinder and gentler with my children. Oh! How I would like to retract angry words and actions. I believe all my children are walking in forgiveness toward me, but it is to their credit, not mine. If I could redo this one so that they never had a memory of my unrighteous anger I would be so grateful for that opportunity. I would love it if my children never had a single memory of my angry countenance.

I would redo allowing my peer group to replace the group of amazing old people I had the privelege to know in my youth. Not that my peers were less valuable than the elders, both were precious to God, but I have this feeling that I blinked and lost the old folks. I regret the times I drove past and planned to stop on the next trip. There were questions they have taken to their graves that I wish I had asked...and written the answers  down. I would take a redo on this one too.

I wish I hadn't cared about being cool. I wasted a lot of time on cool. Wish I had a redo.

I would redo wasting my time in general. I allowed the three p's of pride, procrastination and perfectionism to keep me stalled so often. What might I have accomplished in my youth, with comparatively more strength and energy if I hadn't allowed my time to be wasted? I wish I would have risked doing more things poorly instead of waiting until I was certain to be able to succeed before I attempted things.

I would redo the way I took care of my body.

I would have saved my heart for Mr. Right (known to my friends as Clint). I could have spent my time more wisely than in learning how to survive a bad first marriage. All the lessons I learned in that marriage, I could have learned proactively from reading and heeding God's word. Definite redo there.

I would have said "Thank You!" much more often.

I would have kept my 67 Volkswagen...no explanation needed. I would also have bought that navy blue Mustang with the butterscotch leather interior.

I would have walked more steadfastly for my Lord. I would have been more honorable. I would have sought first the kingdom of God and His Righteousness. Like Samuel, I would have said as a child, "Speak; for thy servant heareth." and I would have meant it.


Make today a great day for someone!
Lawana

5 comments:

*Reading Between the Lines* said...

Hey Lawana,
Thanks for sharing from your heart that...
you care about others
you are not perfect
you love the Lord Jesus most of all.
Love you,
Mommy 2
P.S. God might give you a chance to do a redo or two.

Niculous said...

If you could compile the writings on this weblog, and get it published in a book...you could buy me a brand new truck after paying for your yacht.

Niculous said...

Oh and I love you other mom.

Lawana said...

Mommy 2 He has given me opportunity for many redos. I am so grateful for his grace.

Lawana said...

Niculous, You figure out how I can do it. I will buy you that truck. You know I have adopted children, birth children and Jalapeno children. My Jalapeno children have a special spot in my heart.

Love you too.
Lawana